Opinion Poll
Our Relationship Issues !!!
A INFECTION TO THE SOCIETY- "SEX BUDDIES..
Hot Threads
Supriya T Jagtap Good topic Girish!! I appreciate your concern for the society . But by just giving views out here things wont change, I think it should be a group ef.. more
Ritaban Majumder Dear Girish...I read the article and your comments on the same. Let me share a personal experience. I was in U.S.A last year on work and in one of th.. more
Topic owner: Girish Ingale:
Guys, this is the most shocking moment of my life.I been through this article http://www.idiva.com/bin/idiva/Basic-Ins tinct-Unconventional-love about "sex buddies" where a so-called modern female literally suggests, advises, instructs or shouts to the viewers to go inn for a "friends for benefit" with "no strings attached" just for the sake of sex thirst and to satisfy sexual desire ! I have no problem with what the Indian females are doing and what not ... i am just throwing some light on the present situation of our society ! What is happening ? Is this the same country which we were born 20-30 yr ago ? Sex with the person you love or are gonna marry is fine, but sex with friends ! Disgusting ! This can be done only by a person who is Psychologically ill or is a Sex Maniac ! Sex with friends ? Then what would be future meaning of a friend ? That will ultimately mean if i address a male friend of mine , the world will think i am Gay ! Come onn guys this is a high time ... we stop the spread of this deadly VIRUS which will literally FU*K our bacha-kucha INDIAN CULTURE OF SOCIALISM !
WHAT ARE YOUR VIEWS GUYS , HOW CAN WE HELP "OURSELVES" OUR BROTHERS OUR SISTERS,OUR INDEED FRIENDS ?
Ritaban Majumder
Dear Girish...I read the article and your comments on the same. Let me share a personal experience. I was in U.S.A last year on work and in one of the weekends I was lazing on a sea beach with an American friend of mine. We were discussing a lot of things ranging from politics to environment to sex. He asked me"Does Indians have sex with a friend?" I was obviously a bit taken aback. When I asked him to explain he told me about this "sex buddy" concept. Let us understand one thing Girish,Globalization has given us immense benefits, but on the same it has also injected some of the western practices that may not have been present in India so far. To each his own. I am not supporting the practice, nor can I completely condemn it. And the reason is each one of us has the right to live our own lives. If two mature individuals consent to indulge in sexual activities, tell me how is it going to dismantle the social fabric? The social fabric gets disturbed only when you are creating a harm that is of immense propensity. To you or me, sex buddy may be a concept that is offensive, but to a third person, it may be liberating or of immense satisfaction. An act or two of some hitherto unknown ordinary individuals cannot be trend setting. Yes, when the same things are reported by the media or a celebrity with huge fan followings indulging in such acts, it becomes damaging for the society. But then again, how many of us have been influenced or have taken Tiger Woods sexual escapades positively. Most of us had either relished the statements of his mistresses or had condemned the incidents as an act of betrayal. So, at the end of the day self censorship is something that is the most important. Friendship is known to be the purest form of love, And to lot of us, it will remain the same forever. However stronger the external forces are, I believe, if you are a strong willed person,you will never compromise on your principles. Guys, there is a huge population out of India for whom "sex buddies" may not be an alien concept at all. You cannot say that all of them are "Sex Maniacs" or "Psychologically ill". Probably you are not aware"sex with no strings attached" had been present in India for ages. It's just that since sex was a taboo subject till a couple of decades ago( it's still a taboo subject for many Indians) that no body came out openly. If you have read literature that were written in the early 1900's, you will find a lot of examples about premarital sex, extra-marital sex, incest etc. But one thing I must admit is that sometime I really get annoyed on reading some articles and journals that does a huge propaganda of some borrowed western concepts and cultural traits. I seriously doubt their ethics and whether they are paid by some foreign power to do so deliberately. Just like "Valentines Day"-orchestrated beautifully by some MNCs to sell their products in India. As if we needed a reason to celebrate "love". At the end I would say that we need to be more pragmatic on our approach and cannot really take a stance this manner.
Girish Ingale
Depends... Some people like me sit in one place and deal with thousands of International people from thousand countries ! That necessarily should not change one's views ! It all together depends on our view point.. so i guess reading and awareness shouldn't be a great deal !
Ritaban Majumder
To each his own! I do not know what made you think that my views are BIASED and in which way!!! My friend, it needs a lot of reading and awareness to put up a viewpoint. I am not picking on you. Please do not misunderstand me. But the thing is that, probably my association with nationals of different countries and the time I have spend abroad had made my thought process more global. Unfortunately, most of us are not privileged to that extent and have our vision narrowed down. :-)
Girish Ingale
your views are BIASED my friend !
Gopala Chintakindi
Now, times have changed and people have changed and now people became more practical and see everything in SELFISH point of view. Previously LOVE was just to be sacred and now it has just became a reason to do all things ( in fact all lust things ) that was supposed to be done after marriage. After LOVE now it is slowly going for FRIENDSHIP and also other things.
Coming to this topic, now a days for this educated modernized youth SEX is just a thing. Only for few people it is emotional..others it is just sharing a bodies and satisfying their thirst and for that they try to give someone reasons which are all self centered and selfish and the article which was given by Girish as an example it is just one of the many which I came across. When I read that article, I had a view on it and that view came after carefully analyzing the topic and that view is the writer lost my respect so what ever she said it is just trash for me and i will read for fun and forget.
The things which we can do is first teach yourself.. what is good for you...first define it and then take it.. then pass it on..i will never do what writer said.. i will never encourage my friends and my people to do that...since i say so because that is the only thing which i can do.. i can only advice them and encourage them not to do bad things.. whether they listen to it or not..it is their view and if they deliberately do wrong which i feel wrong then it is simple they lose my friendship and respect and if my family members do then it is all other discussion ..
Girish Ingale
You are right Gopala ... as per the time , busy and always in a pace, we can just advise good , cannot force it.
However, i think , if we cannot force good things , then we could take it in a hard way. MORAL POLICING ! Same as in middle-east !
People will atleast think twice before doing such filthy and cheap things !
Supriya T Jagtap
Good topic Girish!! I appreciate your concern for the society . But by just giving views out here things wont change, I think it should be a group effort instead of one person standing for it... The bestest solution is to just report abuse such people ... i mean there are so many NGO's out in society who looks up to this thing that society is not affected by such dirty people.. may be they are not aware of this thing.. if possible could you just inform to some such NGO if they could do something in this regards.. approach some feminine NGO to look in this, by feminine i mean is which involves more of females governing that NGO...
hopefully this should help!!
Keep smiling n keep posting!!
- Supriya
Gopala Chintakindi
@Girish...society is changing..we are more moving into metro life culture and influenced by western alot..and people like me who are less in number and who still support few old beliefs will always have tough time when we express our thoughts and which is evident by many posts which I posted here at ITIMES. I saying this to give you a evidence of why and how it is changing.
Yes having sex to just have sex is bad and if at all you want to have it you can go to call gal ( respectable modernized word for prostitute ) and have it and in fact that is more better then having it under the name of friendship, love and live-in relationship..I completely agree with you "two people having sex , with emotions, as acceptable throughout the society"...Yes, sometimes we take freedom of speech in wrong way and that iDIVA article is just one example..yes they are cheap publicity and how can we be sure that it was written by a lady..why donot we see that it can also be by man..thats what Girish I follow.. read it.. think abt it.. analyze it ...if it is good follow or admire it..if it is bad..threw it in trash...before that first I define what is GOOD for me and what it mean for me..
Girish Ingale
@Gopala , you are right , since we have not talked much.
In iDiva as well i have mentioned about two people having sex , with emotions, as acceptable throughout the society.But having sex , just for the sake of having it , is like buying sex ! You get me ? I mean even if someone wants to have sex just for the sake of having it , its fine , but why spoil a pure relation called FRIENDSHIP ? This is what i am exaggerating about ! Spoiling the purist form of relationship is not right .If one bloody bitch or bastard wants to get laid , its fine , but who gave them the right to literally publish a article , which can be read by thousands of young guys and girls !
Aren't such cheap publicity stunts a big danger for our society ?This is what i actually mean my friend . Hope you understand , since you are the only one till now, who read my comment on iDiva. I had actually written it in a article style, but those buggers rejected it !
Gopala Chintakindi
Just wanted to put infromt of Supriya and Girish just one point in front of you both..it is not personal attack just discussion ..in many of your post i came to feel that you like and encourage more things like live-in , love and relationship..all those alot..then why come such a drastic against this.. donot you feel the same thing which you do and support are playing some role to such things.
It is not personal attack just a point which i noticed and want to bring in front of you for a discussion of why it is happening instead of how to stop it. I am sorry if you feel so and if you feel this reply offended you will delete after your replies. Will be waiting for replies..
Girish Ingale
yes indeed , this can work out ... i will make it a point i start working on it ! thanks
