Ms Mamta..sad scene babe..but luks like ur husband wants to enjoy the best with the both of u..woh tumko jane nahi de raha aur uske saath bhi rehna chahta hai.. so luks like ur husband is a selfish hypocrite who only wants his needs fullfilled.. try performing oral sex on him for abt 2weeks everyday..this shud change his mind n he will forget dat bitch n be bck in ur arms ..if this does not happen then slap his ass wid a divorce..otherwise ur gonna end up being his sex slave like the other bitch.. n its true

Hi you have done your best to make ur relation alive but you dont make a fool a wise man with ur sacrifies...better you move on as its not too late for you to make new life

You keep doing your best .. they will realise ki jo hai woh jo ho sakta that usse kahi behtar hai... unki batton ko dil pe mat lo abhi abhi shaadi hui hai it will be fine. husband se bhi acche se behave karo. Aur use kaho ki woh uski past thi ab uske khayalo me me rehne se past badlega nahi aur future me woh uski ho nai sakti to present me jo tumhari galti nahi hai uski saza tumhe na de. :)

mamta jee, what are you waiting for ? from the first night you are aware that your husband had relationship with other woman, and you think may be you change him with your love. Its not filmy situation, where heroin change all odd situations with her delicate ways. Mamta jee first you have to admit it ,your husband never came to you, I think you don't have beauty charm and you are less educated then her ex. and above all your husband knows you can"t leave him so he tortured you. Now , first you have to change yourself, cut your hair, wear jeans, and join any company yes i mean to say find suitable job for you. Be strong as well as mentally and financially. Make some one your friend and share your problem. Take some time , if your husband not change after that then go ahead and divorce him and find a new companion for yourself, good luck

you can't expect rsult in a short while , you have to be very patient, try to understand the mentality of your husband , he feel guilty about that girls , support him and make them understand that everyone is responsible for their owe life you can't do anything on that , it may take a month or a year or may be more time .... its just life my situation , i thanks to my wife to support me and understand me . i still love my ex - gf , sometime i dream about her , i feel guilt for her but for one thing i am very clear about that she is my past and now my wife is my life .. its hard but not impossible ..... but there is a 2nd way also , if you feel you are not strong enough than you should go for divorce and start you life from a new beginning. be clear about you self than after you can think about your future .

hi mamta

of not having a kid right now is a good decision

take some more time

may be view of ur husb will change

dear madam i can understand ur confusion. but one thing u should think in very practical way. when we say that we love a person that does not mean that we will not love any other person . it is quiet natural for every human being to show affection towards other even if one is married. but the only thing is whatever we do it should not affect the person who is our life partner. your husband could have maintained her relationship without telling you . this applies to both the sexes but in our country and culture once married our women have only one vision i.e. her husband and her family. when there is no fault from your side in all these things u need not feel confused. just get along with your life. concentrate on your work .develop more friends in your office, improve your status in your office. read lot of books. i am not telling you what to do with your husband . just dont even think about him if you are not dependent on him in anyway.if you are financially independent just forget his name. but if you are dependent on him and his finance and you dont have the support of your parents then there is no other go than to join him otherwise just ignore him . the world is full of people with love like friends, colleagues,brothers, sisters, each one love us in a different way. even so many unknown persons are advising you which mean there is humanity everywhere.After a long gap you can think of doing something leagally if you want.there is nothing to get confused just ignore him for a long period and later you can think about something.

The world is full of means, and u r husband is one of them.Cant say U should leave him , as its difficult to break a relation especially a married life.But for u r sake of yourself.U should leave him.Then only he will realize what he has loose.And how good & big heart lady you are that after knowing so much abt a guy, u decide to marry him.But my friend its time to take a harsh decision for your future.especially no one in the family is also not understanding what u r husband is doing.But reading u r words, i just got a idea of dowry reason is also between there.U answer to prashant that sometime he love you more.Dont misunderstand between love and sex.When a guy says he cant leave u and another one.it is possible in one situation of mother and wife.Nor any case its matter of sex.

He dont love u, because in love there are emotional connection where we take care and worry about each other.How can u think of her opinion of having both with u.

Dont listen what her mother is communicating to you.She is mother of ur husband nor urs and will anythink for ur husband benefit.

Make ur husband and her mother realize that a girl who is still not marrying her , is better than him that she is on one decision of leaving her married life & this world and joining a ashram.Being a woman he is strict to her decision being a man and married he is not able to fullfill the dreams , u both have seen for u r future.

Aur mujhe pata hai ladkiyan dil se bahut soft hoti hai, sayad tum darr rahi ho , kisi decision ko lene mein , par so much of strangers are giving their views so that u can take a right decision.

And I will pray for u that u come to a conclusion.

I think your only best bet is a "threesome". Invite that girl over, and make out with her in front of your husband. Not only you'll be treating him like a king, but you are giving him something that most men will crave for all their lives. He will never leave you.

He will get you, your father's money is saved, you will add some spice to your life ....everybody's happy!

Well Mamta this is what I think, First move to a different room if u r living with ur husband....

Second let him come to a decision and ask him to choose between you and that girl....but make sure if he sticks to you then he has to forget that girl forever and also let that girl also know abt it so that she is also aware of it

if he decides to stick with that girl then you just move out and I'm quite sure that you are well educated to get urself a decent job...

in short become financially independent

Final step to take if you really love ur husband and want to spend ur life with him is that stop the communication between u and ur hubby. let him be free to do anything i mean just start ignoring his presence and start living as if u r living alone. Let him spend few weeks alone if possible.. Sometimes guys dont know what they are missing till the time they really loose it so make him miss u and I'm quite sure u can do this. Wish you all the best and do let me know what happened. I'm available anytijme if u need any advice. Email me at san100oo@indiatimes.com

Mamta, this is classic blackmail by using sympathy and pushing you to a decision which looks ok now, but come another 5 years you will repent. First of all talk to your husband and say him if this is what it continues you will separate from him and he needs to settle his marriage in that case but he will be free to go get married to that girl or choose to stay like this (if your mother in law is also in that discussion it is good). Make sure you don't talk about amount for settlement. First see what happens and then you need to update your parents about this and take a legal advice right now.

comon mamta, you are a woman living in 2011. Stand up for yourself. Stand up for what is right. Be courageous. think long term.

कुछ रिश्तí 5; अपना निश्चì 7;त आकार लेने से पहले ही सवाल खड़े करने लगते हैं। ऐसे रिश्तí 9;ं की ओर कोई बेझिझè 5; कदम बढ़ाने से डरता है। आखिर क्या निर्णë 1; लिया जाए, यह फैसला थोड़ा कठिन होता जाता है। रिश्तí 5; के बारे में मन में संजोए कोमल विचार और उस कल्पनì 6; को हकीकत के रूप में देखने की अभिलाë 9;ा इतनी प्रबल होती है कि उसे तोड़ने के बारे में सोचना तक, जीवन का खात्मì 6; करने जैसा लगता है।

पर, वास्तë 7;िक जीवन में हर पल इतने नागवाë 2; गुजरतí 5; हैं कि साथ-सा 41; जीने की चाहत व इच्छा ही खत्म होती जाती है। साथ घर बसाने का उल्लाì 0; समाप्ê 0;-सा हो जाता है लेकिन नए सिरे से फिर एक रिश्तí 5; की तलाश के विचार से ही आपका दिल घबरानí 5; लगता है।हाæ 6;, यह बात आपको अधिक साल रही होगी कि आपने अपना कीमती समय ऐसे रिश्तí 5; पर क्यों लगा दिया जिसे अंतिम स्वरूê 6; देने में दिल कांप रहा है। आपका समय बेजा नहीं गया है। कुछ न कुछ संबल तो आपको इस रिश्तí 5; से मिला ही है वरना यह रिश्तì 6; बहुत पहले टूट गया होता। हां, निश्चì 7;त ही उतना नहीं मिला जिससे आपको आंखें मूंदकë 2; आखिरी दम तक निभानí 5; की प्रेरé 9;ा मिलतीð 4;

इस महत्वê 6;ूर्ण मोड़ पर आकर तार्कì 7;क विचार करना जरूरी है। दूसरे क्या कहते हैं इस आधार पर किसी के साथ जीवन नहीं गुजारì 6; जा सकता है। जिस प्रश्ê 4; के कारण आपका दिल इस शादी के लिए राजी नहीं हो रहा है वह डर सही है। शादी जैसा रिश्तì 6; खुशी महसूस करने, बेखौफ संवाद बना पाने और सहयोग पाने के लिए ही बनाया जाता है। प्रेम करने के बावजूê 2; यदि आप शादी के बाद भी अंतरंè 7;ता न बन सके तो फिर प्रेम- 57;िवाह का मतलब ही क्या रहा। शादी साथ-सा 41; एक-दूस 52;े के हाथ में हाथ लिए चलने का नाम है। कहने का अर्थ यह है कि चाहे आप कहीं भी हों आपके भीतर भावना ऐसे ही साथ की होती है। पर, इस रिश्तí 5; में आप सड़क की एक ओर तो वह दूसरी ओर चल रहे हैं।

हाथ में हाथ डालने की भावना तो दूर, आप दोनों तो आस-पास भी नहीं चल रहे हैं। कोई व्यावì 1;ारिक तो कोई भावुक हो ही सकता है। यदि वह आपको व्यावì 1;ारिक होने में मदद नहीं कर सकता है तो कम से कम आप पर अपना धौंस जमाकर आपका आत्मवì 7;श्वास तो नहीं तोड़े। साथी यदि सचमुच प्यार करता है तो वह आपका आत्मवì 7;श्वास बढ़ाएगì 6;। आपको सहज और व्यावì 1;ारिक बनने में मदद करेगा ताकि आपके अन्य सामाजì 7;क रिश्तí 5; भी आसानी से संभालí 5; जा सकें।

Please Mamta. This not Hindi film where everything ends up well.



You just can't allow you husband to marry that girl and you stay alongwith like a servant.



You just can't be a door mat and try on a daily basis to win him back.



He'll be playing with you and that girl too.



Agreed you love him a lot but that doesn't allow you to let yourself be used.



It is useless talking to your in -laws.



What do your parents say.



Try talking to your hubby and that girl. Maybe at some stage they sense the blunder they are commitment.



One main thing. Just DON'T get pregnant. I have seen life of a known becoming hell in a similar circumstance.



If nothing materialises then you have no options but to walk out of the marriage. You are still young and can consolidate your life. Giving too much time will simply tear you apart. Physically and emotionally

MY Dear Friend Mamta,Tum phale to tumra self respect kis me hai who dunde kosis kare our tumri family ke sath bahte kare koi solution nilka mere to advise hai ki leave it If you have self respact

Have a talk with ur husband in private and in presence of ur parents also: give a reasonable time (6 months to one year)to ur marriage if both parties agree.If there is no change in status after the agreed time,then u can proceed for divorce.

Wish you a good luck.

Hello mamta gd mng, i had read ur above post, u r such a decent and honest girl i think and u love ur husband a lot, but he is in love with another girl that why he cant see ur emotions, if he want still mary with that girl so plz i think u should leave both them becoz after marriage u will be in house just a servant i think u dnt have any baby now, so before that talk to your parents and divorce that guy, becoz u r so sweet, plz do whatever ur heart says, but plz give little to ur mind to think about this situation, about now and about ur future, God bless you dear frnd